When Katie Neeves talks about happiness now, she does so with a certainty hard won over a lifetime.
“I can’t stop smiling. There’s no inner turmoil anymore. I love my life,” she says with a confidence which radiates down the phone.
That sense of peace – after decades of struggle – is what Katie – a proud trans woman, hopes to share as the first ever Patron of the Leicestershire LGBTQ+ Centre, which is celebrating its 50th anniversary this year.
Founded on 26 September 1976, the centre has been a constant presence for LGBTQ+ people across Leicestershire and Rutland – adapting, evolving and surviving through decades of social change. For Katie, being asked to represent it is both an honour and a responsibility.
“I feel very honoured, to be honest. I’m extremely flattered that they thought enough of me to make me their very first patron,” she says.
Katie’s story is deeply personal, shaped by memories that stretch back to early childhood.
She remembers being just three or four years old, trying on her sister’s clothes in secret.
“It felt so right,” she says. “And then my mum caught me and told me off. It was humiliating. It sowed the seeds that it was dirty or wrong – not something respectable people did.”
Picture credit: Katie Neeves
What followed was decades of suppression. Katie tried to conform – first as a boy, then as a man – believing that was what society expected of her.
“Nobody chooses to be trans,” she says. “I didn’t want to be trans. I tried to be who I thought I should be for 48 years, but eventually I just couldn’t go on.”
By her late forties, the gender dysphoria she had lived with all her life became unbearable. On 11 January 2018, she finally admitted to herself that she was a transgender woman.
“It was frightening,” she says. “On one level it was a relief – the hardest thing I’ve ever done was admitting it to myself. But I knew there would be loss.”
In April 2018, Katie came out publicly through a video shared with clients of her long-running photography business – a brand that had carried her former name for more than two decades.
“I was freelance, self-employed. I wasn’t protected by employment law. If people had an issue with me being trans, my phone could just stop ringing,” she explains.
She remembers her finger hovering over the mouse before pressing ‘publish’.
“I knew my life would never be the same again.”
What followed was not rejection – but love.
“Hundreds of messages of support came pouring in. I felt so loved. What I thought would be the worst moment of my life became one of the most uplifting.”
That moment changed everything. Katie’s story was picked up by local media, then national TV and radio. She became – in her own words – a “gobby trans woman”, and later founded Cool 2 B Trans, documenting her transition openly so others wouldn’t feel alone.
Picture credit: Leicester LGBTQ+ Centre
Some of her videos – including those filmed during major surgery – have now been viewed more than a million times and are used by NHS services to help other trans patients prepare.
“If I’d had videos like that before my surgery, I’d have been far less frightened,” she says. “Knowing they’re helping people means everything.”
Despite her visibility, Katie says being openly trans in the UK today comes with relentless abuse.
“There’s not a day that goes by where I’m not called a paedophile, a predator, a groomer, mentally ill – every single day,” she tells Pukaar.
She has built resilience, but worries deeply about those who don’t yet have that strength.
“Around 50 per cent of trans people are too frightened to step outside their front door. That’s why safe spaces matter so much.”
It is why the Leicestershire LGBTQ+ Centre – which last year alone delivered more than 300 group sessions and supported over 750 individuals – feels so vital to her.
“It’s a place where you can draw strength from people in similar situations. There’s a real sense of belonging. That’s what saves lives.”
Meeting some of the centre’s founding members during her appointment left Katie feeling humbled.
“I was seven years old when the centre was founded. For most of my life I didn’t even realise I was part of the LGBTQ+ community. Now I know I occupy two letters – and I’m proud of that.”
As Patron, she plans to use her profile to amplify the centre’s work, attend events, and support its mission however she can.
“Ultimately, we all just want to be happy,” she says. “That’s what this is about. Living your truth takes courage, and there may be losses along the way – but life is too short to be miserable.”
As the Leicestershire LGBTQ+ Centre marks 50 years of support, Katie’s story stands as a reminder of why the work continues – and why, even now, safe spaces, visibility and compassion remain essential.
To find out more about Leicester LGBTQ Centre, visit: www.leicestershirelgbtqcentre.org
